Modern dating terms

An informal dating guideline pacing commitment in threes: three dates before exclusivity, three weeks of contact, three months to deeper commitment.

Casual dating means seeing one or more people without exclusivity or an expectation of a committed, long-term relationship.

Courting is a traditional, deliberately paced form of dating pursued with marriage or long-term commitment as the explicit goal from the outset.

Maintaining flirtatious contact with people other than one's current partner as an emotional cushion against the relationship ending.

Dating is the practice of meeting and spending time with potential romantic partners to assess compatibility, on a spectrum from casual to committed.

Dating with intention means approaching dating deliberately, with clear personal values and goals, instead of dating passively or "seeing where things go."

Internet slang, short for 'delusional', for holding unrealistically optimistic beliefs about a romantic prospect, often said self-deprecatingly.

A sexual orientation characterized by experiencing sexual attraction only after forming a strong emotional bond with a person.

Ethical non-monogamy. A relationship structure in which all parties knowingly and consensually engage with multiple romantic or sexual partners.

Exclusive means two people have agreed to date only each other, without necessarily using labels like boyfriend or girlfriend.

FLR (Female-Led Relationship): a consensual dynamic where the woman leads decision-making, from daily choices to full power exchange.

The explicit, identifying reveal of a new partner on social media: tagged, named, full face. The opposite of a soft launch and usually the next step.

LTR stands for long-term relationship, a stated dating intention for a committed, ongoing partnership rather than something casual.

Small, ambiguous behaviors (saving an ex's number under a fake name, flirty DMs) that fall short of infidelity but signal emotional risk.

A primarily monogamous relationship that permits occasional, agreed-upon sexual involvement with others. Coined by Dan Savage.

"No strings attached": a relationship style characterized by sexual involvement without emotional commitment, monogamy expectations, or a shared future.

A more recent variant of zombieing in which the returning person knows full well their reappearance is unwelcome and does it anyway.

PDA stands for public display of affection, meaning affectionate gestures like hand-holding, hugging, or kissing shown in public.

A form of ethical non-monogamy involving multiple consensual, ongoing romantic relationships rather than purely sexual ones.

PPM stands for Pay Per Meet, a sugar dating arrangement in which payment is made per date rather than a recurring allowance.

QOS stands for "Queen of Spades," slang for a woman who has a stated preference for or exclusively dates Black men.

The capacity to read and navigate a relationship's dynamics: sensing a partner's emotions, communicating needs, and adjusting to sustain it.

Slang for charm or skill in romantically attracting a partner, especially through conversation. Short for 'charisma'; 2023 Oxford word of the year.

TDG's composite metric for a city's romantic-market viability: weighted income, education, age distribution, walkability, and venue density.

A set of people someone dates or talks to at once without committing to any one, kept in rotation while deciding who to pursue seriously.

A descriptor for someone who finds intellect or intelligence the primary trigger of sexual attraction.

"Something casual" means dating or hooking up without commitment, exclusivity, or expectations of a serious relationship.

A switch is someone who enjoys and moves between both dominant and submissive roles in BDSM and kink dynamics, rather than holding one fixed role.

The early, pre-commitment phase of getting to know a partner, mostly over text and DMs, before either person defines the relationship.

A sudden, often irrational feeling of disgust toward someone you were attracted to, triggered by a small behaviour, usually ending it for good.

A dating convention: wait three days after a date before making contact, to signal interest without seeming too eager. Now considered outdated.

TDG's metric for cross-neighborhood dating feasibility: average shared transit reach × density of shared third-place venues.

A unicorn is a single person, often a bisexual woman, sought by an existing couple as a third partner for a threesome or triad relationship.