WarningCommunication
Avoidangulation
/əˌvɔɪ.dæŋ.ɡjʊˈleɪ.ʃən/
The mental gymnastics used to rationalize a partner's avoidant or distant behavior — explaining away the coldness rather than naming it.
Etymology & origin
A blend of 'avoidant' and 'triangulation/contortion'.
✦ Relationship psychology
A defense mechanism used by anxious partners to protect themselves from the painful realization that their partner is simply not emotionally available or invested.
Live texting example
He didn't text me for three days, but it's just because he's dealing with a huge project at work and his childhood pet passed away five years ago so he has deep trauma around intimacy.
Boundary guide: how to respond
- 1Look at the behavior without excuses: If someone wants to talk to you, they will find 10 seconds in their day to say so.
- 2Prioritize your own peace of mind over defending their emotional absence.
#excuses#anxious attachment#rationalization#avoidant
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